thoughts on a lazy sunday afternoon

im in a weird mood today, maybe also because im about 20% feeling the effects of being out late last night. senses was another success, its pretty amazing to see the talents of all the artist & their point of views. a lot of cool people came out too, even a girl that i only met once previously at a craft event, and a guy that i havent even seen in years that i had social dance class together with. overall we had a huge turnout for the art side, and im so grateful to everyone who came out to support!

i got to thinking today about the art that i make. i left disney last october when my contract was up so i can do things that i really wanted to do. ultimately, i think i was just craving to be creative again. nowadays, im painting regularly, im taking self defense classes, im working on a couple of websites for trade, im hiking & doing yoga in the beautiful outdoors, but im still lacking in direction. living completely off of my savings plus and staying at my parents house, im not sure what my next move is.

i was at a rock you future event this past week. rock your future is a class at cal poly, where students visit high schools & middle schools to talk to kids about going to college. i went in and out of some of the sessions, taking pictures of the kids & our speakers. basically the whole point is to get the kids interested in the idea of college, and learn about what it has to offer them, since a lot of the schools we go to are in the lower income areas. the speakers were talking about how college is extremely important for success in the future, and how you wouldnt be wanting to live at home when you are 24 or 25. (darnit, thats me.) when the session was done and we met up with everybody afterwards, one of my old classmates that i havent seen since graduation approached me to say hi, and i asked her how she was doing nowadays, and she replied "oh, you know, work" unenthusiastically. it got me thinking...we are here to talk about going to college (which is fantastic and the kids definitely could use some encouragement) but where does it really get us anyways? is it so we can get a job that we are unenthusiastic about? is having a job the only sensible way to go about life? whats the point of all this if we are just ending up unhappy anyways?

so i have concluded:
job = (usually) not so happy = "direction in life"
unemployment = im quite happy = lack of direction